KILLING MY LIFE!!

Have I mentioned on here how much I hate wednesdays? They kill my life. Wednesday is the day that The Guru (licencee of our work) comes in and either conducts staff "training" (not sure what exactly he's training us in other than time wasting skills), or subjects us to fucked up development sessions, like SWOT* analysis. WHAT THE FUCK.

Honestly, I would rather be digging my eyeballs out with a goddamned spoon. No, really I would.

So I don't start work til 1pm Wednesdays, which means I waste my morning thinking about how much I don't wanna go in, and what miraculous deadly infection I could have contracted in the 2 hours between being in there doing my workout, and starting work.

I have one hour to go...nanna nap time I think...

Now where is that spoon??

In other news...hmmm what's been going on?

Between work, a massive tax bill I copped on friday, having all the girls over on sunday...not much else has been happening...

Back into comp prep which i won't go on about here (that's my other blog)...have a birthday this friday night which may end up messy...work saturday then a comp to go watch sunday...aside from that life is boring as hell :( Note to self...must fix that...

Hmmm 59 mins to decide whether it's worth faking my own death lol

*SWOT = strenghts, weaknesses, opportunities, threats. YES THAT IS THE SHIT I AM TALKING ABOUT. seriously...kill my life...

RaNdOm FaCtS aBoUt MeEeEeEeEeEeEeEeEe...

i am a true virgo in many ways...a perfectionist who is always right...
i am terrified of cockroaches. can't even pick a dead one up with a dustpan.
i cured my fear of heights by hot air ballooning while in egypt.
i have an extra pair of ribs.
i loooooove ice cream, especially gelato. you could put any dessert in front of me and if there is a bowl of gelato, that's what i am likely to pick (unless there is a chocolate fudge brownie, which comes with ice cream...)
i have two pomeranians, felix and trixie. they are very cute. felix is the oldest but is a toy pom so looks like a puppy. trixie is a giant pom and has both epilepsy and ADHD (fact!!)
i love weight training but hate cardio. with a passion. always have. always will.
i am a massive eater, and can out-eat most people when i am not dieting. i once won a meat eating contest at a steakhouse. i won in the dessert round (go figure, and yes it was ice cream!)
i think my mum is the nicest person i have ever met. i love her to death.
i would drop everything and move to rome in a heartbeat. same with venice.
i love living on my own.
my house caught fire when i was showering once late at night. when the firefighters turned up i was still dripping wet, wearing only a bathrobe, and still had shampoo in my hair.
i have an obsession with shoes, and own too many to even count.
i have pierced my nose and tongue two times each, and my belly button three times. the only remaining piercing is my nose.
i never ate seafood til i started dieting for my first bodybuilding (figure) comp.
the first time i wore a bikini in public was on stage in a national figure competition, in front of a few hundred people.
me and my brother never got along well til i moved out of home. i spent a lot of my childhood running away from him while he was throwing things like darts at me. we are really close now but he lives in melbourne.
i am double jointed in all my fingers.
before i was a personal trainer i worked as an investigator for over 8 years.
when i was a child i was very accident prone and had to have stitches a lot...by the age of 5 i had had them 6 times. as a teenager i progressed to broken bones, and have done 4 ribs, both ankles, most of my fingers, my nose (5 times), some of my vertebrae...knock on wood, there haven't been any serious injuries in a few years.
i am obsessed with Bono, and Lenny Kravitz. love em both.
i used to be a massive drinker...even had my stomach pumped when i was young and stupid.
i spent my teenage years battling an eating disorder, and was put in a clinic for treatment of anorexia when i was 15.
i am addicted to the Rocky series...and the Sopranos.
i often wonder if i will die alone.
i LOVE to travel and if i was rich, it's all i would do. i am dying to go to the carribean.
i love to read but hardly ever get a chance.
my favourite sound is the ocean. i would love to live near the water so i could fall asleep to that sound every night.
my best friend is getting married in august. after that, i am officially DONE with bridesmaid duties.
if i only had 24 hours to live, i don't even know how i would spend that time!!
my friends and family mean the world to me and there is nothing i wouldn't do for them.

tick tock tick tock

What's that tick tock noise, you ask?

Clearly it's not my alarm clock, which hasn't miraculously come back to life. (That's just a stupid thought anyway. My alarm clock was electric. No noise.)

No, it's the sound of me...waiting...for Mamma Huntsman to work out it was me who killed her 40,000 baby Huntsman offspring that I happened to come home and find. I am guessing she's gonna be an angry mamma too. Not my problem - it's my house and unless Mamma huntsman is willing to pay rent for her million babies, she can find her own place.

Vicki - 40,000.
Huntsman - Zero.

DIE LITTLE MOFOS!!!

...the end of an era...

OMG I can't believe it. Today marks the end of an era.

I woke up this morning at 6.30 - yes on my goddamned day off, I still can't sleep the fuck in.

Anyway back to the story.

I woke up and everything appeared normal. I looked at my phone. 6.30am. I looked at my alarm clock. 6.35am (I keep it 5 mins fast in the hope that one day I will actually *forget* that I purposely made it 5 mins fast and miraculously be early for everything).

OK enough of being sidetracked.

I get out of bed and make myself my oats with chocolate protein powder and a teaspoon of natural peanut butter mixed in. Fave meal of the day. What kind of a boring ass life do I lead?? LOLZ... (that's just for you Foxxxxy).

A little later, I walk into my bedroom. I happen to glimpse at previously mentioned alarm clock. It now says 11.01. I begin thinking, WTF?? Seriously, it can't be that late. I look at my watch. 7.32am. I look at my phone. 7.32am. Hmmm something not quite right.

I leave my bedroom to do other time wasting stuff, you know like washing, and the dishes and stuff. I return to bedroom at 8am. Alarm clock now says 9.18am.

Seriously. IS SOMEONE FUCKING WITH ME???

So I have been in mourning today. I have had that alarm clock since I was like, 11 or something. It is part of me. I have gone to replace it quite a few times but could never bring myself to do it cos seriously, that's my alarm clock!!!

Which is now among the dearly departed.

Rest in Peace, little clock.

The End.